As I sit and and start to write this letter, you are in the hospital, fighting for you life. This letter, one which you will never receive, contains my feelings and thoughts about our relationship. These are words that i'll never be able to say to you because i've never been able to master your language.
Everytime i walk into the ward, i see you lying on the hospital bed. The sight of your wrinkled face and sunken cheekbones scares me to death. I walk to the side of the bed, calling out to you softly. You open your eyes and stare at me for a moment. I'm not sure if you still recognise me. I'm not sure of what to say. I don't know how to make your pain go away. I don't dare to touch you, for the fear that i may hurt you more. I try my best to hold back my tears everytime i see you. All i can do is to stand next to you and watch you.
I hold your hands gently but you grasp mine tightly. I know that you know i'm here. It is a relief to feel you. I hear you gasping for air. It breaks my heart to see you like this. So helpless in a situation and i cannot do anything to ease your suffering. I think about those times in the past when you are full of life and energy. I remember those days when you used to go out all the time to visit your friends all over the island. But now, you are helpless.
I know they have signed the letter. I know they are prepared to let you go even thought i am not prepared at all. But i know i'll have to let you go because living in this world each day means another day of suffering for you. I know i cannot keep you here.
I want to let you know this, Grandma. I still love you. And i always will.
Your grand-daughter,
tIng
Am i all alone in this universe?
There's no love on these streets.
I've given mine away to a world that didn't want it anyway.
There's no love on these streets.
I've given mine away to a world that didn't want it anyway.
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