18 hours of sleep

*tIng walks into the the room, looking very stoned.*

No.. i did not drink yesterday night. No i'm not taking drugs. I just woke up from my sleep marathon. 18 hours of non-stop sleep, which explains why i am blogging so early on a Sunday morning. *evil laughs* But somehow, i dont really feel as fresh i am supposed to. I think its because of the bad dreams i've been having.

Last friday (or rather thusday night), i dreamt that i was screaming in my dream. Wailing to be exact. Desperate, very sad and hurt.. I just kept wailling. Then i woke up. Sudden and in cold sweat. The feeling that something heavy was on my chest and i couldn't breathe. Scared and alone. Damm i hate this feeling.

At work, i interviewed this guy JY whose actually Huilin's friend. When i met up with him, i was abit taken aback by his simliarity with my ex. Maybe its the way he looks, the way he talks and the feeling he gives me. Exactly the same. Maybe ppl from Navy are all the same. *shrugs*

After work, i went home, changed and met C for a while. Or should i say the whole night to dawn. I'm strange. In past, all i wanted was a relationship with long term commitment. But after 2 guys in a row who ran away from me, i gave up.

Now, when its right in front of me, i rejected it. Maybe its because i have not gotten over things. But most importantly, i just don't feel like being in a relationship now. I'm afraid of ME not wanting to commit. I mean, C is a nice guy but i don't want to hurt him. I think he asked me at the wrong time. Not fated i guess... Now, if you ask me, i'll tell you i would like to date more than one person at the same time. I know its mean and totally immoral.

I JUST WANT TO PLAY.

Yes.. Now.. I want to play!

And party! (or rather waste my life away for a while.)

I'm bored.

Very bored.

I need to do more.

Club? Was supposed to go Chinablack but guess i over slept. *grinz* Right now, i'm alone at home. Its rainning now so guess I wun be able to blade/run today. Wanted to order Mac for lunch but i think its mean to ask ppl to ride in the rain just to delivery lunch. I'll wait till the rain stop. I think i wun die from late lunches.

I had a strange dream last night. Another one of my lesbian fantasties. Maybe its God's way of telling me i should be a lesbian. *considers* In my dream, i was kissing this beautiful gal and it was so sweet. Her body was warm and she smell so nice. Like flowers. And we were on the bed, just kissing.

I woke up, feeling happy.

I should be a lesbian.

Am i all alone in this universe?
There's no love on these streets.
I've given mine away to a world that didn't want it anyway.